This might seems minor or silly, but I am on day 4 of not playing a game on my cell phone. Over time, I realized that I would start up the game, which would last a minute or two, as a result of an anxious thought. The game was a diversion, and some would say a harmless one. But I’ve been thinking about Psalm 139:23-24 lately. This is how it reads in the NIV:
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
The Psalmist asks the Lord to know his anxious thoughts and be tested by Him. An anxious thought can be a test. When I encounter an anxious thought, how will I respond? What does it mean to pass? What does it mean to fail?
Picking up a computer game seems like failing. When an anxious thought comes my way I want to face it with faith. May the Lord give me faith to trust Him and not let anxiety have its way in my heart.
The coaching relationship is unlike other professional and personal relationships. Here are a few things that I like for my clients to know upfront:
- Coaching is unique in that our communication is not limited to the time slot of our conversation. During the week we might connect for a quick conversation or exchange e-mail.
- As a coaching client, you are allowed to provide feedback on how you are coached. You have permission tell me how I can best coach you to in a given situation.
- Failure is welcome. If you’ve failed to follow through or somehow blown it please don’t hide it or cancel your appointment. A failure can be a profitable and instructive learning opportunity.
- Coaching is all about achieving goals. Consider what you want to accomplish at the outset. Your goals should be specific, measureable, and challenging.
- In an effort to progress, it is possible that I might suggest other tools and resources, such as skills inventories, etc.
- In order to reap the most benefits from each coaching session, spend some time considering what you’d like to cover during the coaching session. Write down your thoughts if you can and bring your notes to our conversation.
- As well as spending time ahead of the coaching conversation, plan on taking some time after the conversation to reflect on any insights gained and on next steps.
- The coaching client sets the agenda for each conversation. It is up to you decide what we discuss at each meeting. If something very difficult – or something very exciting! – has happened during the week, it can be the topic of our conversation on that day.
- At the outset of coaching, we choose a date to evaluate. While every situation is different, three months is a good milepost. At this pre-determined point, we discuss the relationship, evaluate progress, consider changes, and whether or not the end-point is on the horizon.
- The goal of life coaching is achievement, breakthrough and change. Some of our conversations will be powerful and insightful. Others will not seem as significant. But this is to be expected. And sometimes things are happening in your soul below the surface during what seems like a routine conversation.
. . . and not the coach.
Every now and then you get hold of a book that you know that you really connect with. Somewhere in the first or second chapter you know that you are in for a profitable experience as you read. I am in the middle of one of those books. ”Co-Active Coaching” by Laura Whitworth, et al, presents an excellent description of the art of coaching.
There are some powerful passages that I have been relishing and one of them is this one:
The co-active coach must make the shift from “I am powerful” to “the coaching relationship is powerful.” Powerful coaching is not about being a powerful coach; it is about the power the client experiences. Imagine that the coaching relationship is a recharging place where clients tap into the source of energy they need to get over the hurdles in their lives. The can’t get the work done if the energy level is low. The power comes not directly from the coach, however, but from the relationship — the synergy of energy clients bring in the form of desire and motivation and the energy coaches bring in the form of their commitment, skills, and understanding of human change. (page 16)
I appreciate how this paragraph explains the coaching relationship. Many believe coaches to be wise dispensers of valuable counsel. While it is tempting to step in with the solution (at least, what the solution is in your mind), this is not my role. Rather, a coach is a facilitator as the client plots his course, sets goals, makes decisions, and works through obstacles. Don’t get me wrong — the coach is of great value to the journeyer. But he is not a director, or an adviser, or one who offers counsel on what to do next. The coach, as Whitworth and her co-authors teach, is a partner who comes alongside and helps the client succeed.
This question from chapter 5 is just one of many that Jesus asks in the book of John. One of 53 — yes, I counted them — according to the version I read.
Have you ever wondered why He asks questions? Was He ever lacking in information?
Answer: No.
Jesus knew everything in His days on earth. He knew the type of death that He would die and that He would be resurrected (Matthew 20:18-19). And that there would be a colt tied up in a certain place for Him to ride into Jerusalem (Matthew 21:2). He knew that there would be a shekel in the mouth of a fish and that this fish would bite a hook that Peter would cast (Matthew 17:27).
It would be no fun to play “Battleship” with Jesus:
“B-8.”
“Hit! Right again Jesus!”
The all-knowing Son of God asked questions throughout His ministry in order to build our faith.
Demonstrating that you really don’t know what lies around the next corner (literally), drivers heading into downtown St. Paul today see this image of me running around Lake of the Isles.
Five years ago, I would have had trouble running to the end of the block. But at my prosthetist’s encouragement, I was fitted with a running prosthesis and it has been great fun. The leg works really well and I have been blessed to have run a couple thousand miles over the past few years.
Running was the one activity that I had missed not having a right foot. As a teenager I would run the mile course near our house or around the high school track. To be back on the running trail in this season of my life is an unexpected gift.
But there is more to come, and this is where I have fully set my hope.
Reading through the betrayal and arrest of Jesus last week, these sentences grabbed my attention:
“And one of them struck the servant of the high priest and cut off his right ear. But Jesus said, ”No more of this!” And he touched his ear and healed him.” (Luke 22:50-51)
Imagine the scene. Out comes the sword and in a moment some guy is looking at his ear on the ground. The ear isn’t just damaged or mangled — it is gone. What a shock it must have been for him to be separated from his ear. But it is absolutely no trouble for Jesus to restore it. He simply touches what was left and: a new ear! All of the intricate tissues and ligaments and skin were created anew and it was shaped just right so that sound could travel down his ear canal.
Those of us who belong to Jesus are looking ahead to the restoration of our bodies in the coming age. He has promised it in His word and has given us demonstrations of His healing power while He walked on earth. He can replace an ear and He can replace a right foot. Complete healing awaits God’s children when their bodies are restored in the next life.
I am delighted and thankful to be able to run around Lake of the Isles with my prosthetic leg. But one of the joys of eternity for me will be putting on a pair of shoes and running with two feet on a heavenly trail.
” . . . set your hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ.” 1 Peter 1:13
